I've Learned
by angel-death-dealer
Summary: [The Italian Job] A few years after the L.A Heist, Charlie Croker reflects on what he's learned during his life. Includes CharlieStella fluff! ONESHOT


**This is just a one-shot of Charlie Croker looking back on his life and all the things he's learnt. Please R & R**

**Sam**

**xx**

_I've learned...that a smile is an inexpensive way to improve your looks._

Stella taught me this. A few times, I've come home from work, and found her crying; red puffy eyes, tears stained cheeks, and in short, even though I love her, I can admit that she looks terrible. I talk to her, try to do what I can to cheer her up, and then she'll smile. Sometimes, it's just a small smile. Othertimes, it's a big grin that is accompanied by a laugh; but no matter the size of the smile, it makes her look beautiful, even with the evidence of her tears.

_I've learned...that I can't choose how I feel, but I can choose what I do about it._

Stella's the main reason I've learned this one as well. Before we got back together, after we had stolen all the gold back from Steve, I was a complete wreck from loving her. I just didn't know what to do with myself. My head was telling me that she didn't want me, and that I shouldn't love her, but my heart was telling me another story. Eventually, after three weeks of torture, I realised that I couldn't go on like that - so I told her how I felt. I stood there before her, ready to be turned down, but she loved me.

_I've learned...that the best classroom in the world is at the feet of an older person._

John Bridger taught me everything I value in my life. Seeing as my father was so terrible at the whole parenting idea, John seemed the perfect role model. In the end, I respected him more than I did my real father. He didn't just teach me about theiving, and how to be a good leader, but he taught me how to be a good father, which I learned from the way he talked about Stella all the time; how much he loved her, and missed her. He taught me about loyalty, and trust, and by introducing me to his daughter, he taught me about love.

_I've learned...that when you're in love, it shows._

Before I got with Stella the first time, before John was killed, everyone around me knew that I liked her before I did. All the time they were coming up to me, watching me when I was around her, mocking me for it. Handsome Rob especially. He kept on at me, pestering me on whether or not I was in love. That was part of the reason that persuaded me to do something about it, if only to get those guys off my back.

_I've learned...that just one person saying to me, "You've made my day!", makes my day._

I like the people around me to be happy. Even if I'd had the worst day in the world, seeing other people smile can make up for it. I remember one time when I had been sitting in traffic for an hour and a half, and had people in my face hassling me all day, but because I knew Stella had been having a bad week, I went home, cooked her dinner, gave her a massage, and afterwards, she told me that I had made her day special. Suddenly, I didn't feel so stressed out anymore. She has a strange gift of taking away those feelings.

_I've learned...that having a child fall asleep in your arms is one of the most peaceful feelings in the world._

Thats another thing that happens in our house when I get stressed. I'll come home, sit down, and as if she knows, my daughter will get her little fleece blanket and her pacifier, and she will sit in my lap, and fall asleep. Having Megan in my arms reminds me that everything that day has been worth it. If I hadn't had such a bad day, I might not have got so much release by holding her. Everything melts away into nothing, and I'll sit there for hours, stroking her golden hair, just being a father to her.

_I've learned...that you should never say no to a gift from a child._

How anyone can deny children's gifts is beyond me. I love to hear Megan's chirpy voice calling through the house. "Mommy! Daddy! Look what I've done!" And she'll come running over to me and Stella, showing us a picture she's painted, complete with the coloured streaks that are all over her face; or a model made out of cereal boxes and glue. Our kitchen is full of those paintings, stuck all over the fridge and the walls. She has all her models on a shelf on her bedroom wall, still proud of them even if they are a year old. Even if she didn't want them, I'd find a big box for them, and put them away somewhere, because I'm as proud of them as she is, and I wouldn't have the heart to throw them away; not when I have seen the acheivment in her face when she shows them to us.

_I've learned...that no matter how serious your life requires you to be, everybody needs a friend to act goofy with._

That's where Handsome Rob, Lyle, and Left-ear come in. Lyle, even though he is so unsuccessful in his love life, can find a sexual innuendo in a funerary speech. Of course, I've probably pulled him out of more tight spots than he has me, but he's a good guy. Handsome Rob, the real ladies man, was the reason that I told Stella I still loved her after we had pulled off the heist. Left-ear, the bomb of the group in more ways that one, has been my friend since kindergarten. Through the L.A Heist, even though we were busy with the cars, and planning how we would get to the gold, we still managed to act like kids sometimes, which in the end left Stella feeling like the mother of 4 5-year-old boys who were arguing over the same toy

_I've learned...that money doesn't buy class._

After we had all that money from the gold, we all changed. I thought that it would make me more arrogant, more obnoxious, or rather, that was what scared me. Instead, I found love, and happiness. It made me a better person, because I knew that I could provide anything that the people I love needed. It didn't change me as much as it could have. It didn't make me one of the most sought after person in the world, and it didn't make me the most ignored, but I'm happy with where my adventures have led me.

_I've learned...that under everyone's hard shell is someone who wants to be appreciated and loved._

Yet another thing that Stella has taught me. When I first confronted her after we had found Steve living in L.A. she was cold towards me, I could even go as far to say that she hated me. I definately didn't feel safe in there when she picked up that power tool, giving it a quick test while she let out some angry comments. But I knew why she was like that. She missed her father, and I knew that she blamed me for that. It was that which broke us up, ended our relationship, because she thought that my plans had gotten her father killed. By bringing her to L.A with us, I gradually broke that shell down, and the night that she had her "date" with Steve, the shell shattered, and her defences dropped. From the minute that she let me in, I knew that I was never going to back out again.

_I've learned...that God didn't do it all in one day. What makes me think that I can?_

It look me a year to track down Steve, even with the help of Skinny Pete. It could have taken me ten years, but I would have carried on looking for him. It wasn't about the gold, it was about getting justice for John Bridger. To make sure that I got it right, though, was going to take longer than a few hours...

_I've learned...that when you plan to get even with someone, you are only letting that person continue to hurt you.  
_

By wanting to get even with Steve, rather than putting it behind me, I let him have that hold over me for a year longer than I should have done. It also brought back the pain for Stella, who, after finally getting over her father's death, was drawn into our project that was based on it.

_I've learned...that there's nothing sweeter than holding your family to you and feeling their breath on your cheeks._

This was something I learned only the other night. I woke up on the couch to find that all of us had fallen asleep infront of a film that was on the television. Megan, who was already curled up asleep when the film began, her head resting on my shoulder while I cuddled her, was still in the same position, with her little arms wrapped around my neck; and Stella was leaning with her head on my other shoulder. I could feel both of them breathing against me, and stayed awake for hours, not moving, not speaking, and just enjoying the feeling of having my wife and daughter close. It made the feeling of getting one over Steve feel insignificant in comparison.

_I've learned...that life is like a roll of toilet paper. The further you get through the roll, the faster it goes._

It seemed to take forever for me and Stella to get where we are now, but now that we're here, everything's going so fast. After we were married, it wasn't long before Megan arrived, and now, she's growing up so fast. It seemed like only yesterday that I was in the hospital, hearing her newborn cried, and now she's four years old. She's my little angel, one of the two reasons I get up in the morning, the other being Stella. Now, I stand and watch her, dancing around in the garden. She wants to be a ballerina, she keeps telling me. She has a little dress on now with a puffy skirt that Stella brought her this morning.

"Looks like an angel, doesn't she?" Stella comments as she comes up behind me. Her arms wrap around my waist and her chin rests on my shoulder.

"Our little angel." I correct her. She'll always be my little angel. She's a real Daddy's girl. I never thought I could love someone as much as I love Megan, and Stella. No matter what my baby does, nothing she can do makes me sad. Even the little things, like seeing her smile, hearing her laugh, or having her run up to me, calling me 'Daddy', just make my heart melt.

I notice how much her golden hair and crystal blue eyes look like Stella's. There's no doubt that she's going to get more beautiful with every passing day. "She looks like you, you know." I tell Stella, turning my head to brush my lips against her ear.

I feel her head shake a little. "Not with that cheeky grin, she doesn't. That only comes from one person, Charlie Croker."

"Daddy!" Megan calls, and she comes running up to me. She's only just noticed me there, and she jumps up as I rush to lift her off her feet. Wrapping her arms around my neck as I balance her on my stomach, her little legs snug on my hips, she babbles excitedly. "Daddy. Mommy says I can go for ballet lessons! Then I can be a real ballerina!"

"That's great, princess." I tell her, even though I knew about Stella's suggestion already. I get a funny feeling in the bottom of my stomach that makes me smile when she leans forward and gives me a little kiss. Suddenly I don't want her to grow up. I don't want her to leave for college, getting her own place. I want her to stay here where I can watch every second of her growing. But then I am reminded of all the things that she's going to do that I can still be apart of. Her first day of school, that's coming up at the end of the summer; being a bridesmaid at Left-ear's wedding; her first boyfriend, oh yes, I intend to have a lot of fun with him; then I can see her settling down, making herself happy, something that Stella's father never got to see, but I know that he would have been proud to see us both now.

John Bridger told me to find someone I want to spend the rest of my life with, and hold onto her forever. I don't think at the time that he meant for it to be his daughter, but its strange how things like that work out. I'm glad that I took his advice though. Stella and I love each other, and Megan and the bands on our fingers are proof of that. Having both of my girls here, close to me, gives me more security than any amount of gold ever could.


End file.
